Life has a way of testing us, often presenting us with decisions that challenge our courage, our resilience, and our very essence. My journey began with a routine colonoscopy. I was experiencing GI issues that progressively got worse. My doctor was concerned and scheduled a colonoscopy, during which a small cancerous polyp was found. Because this cancerous tumor was found I was referred to a genetic counselor for testing. About two weeks later, the results of the test showed that I am BRCA2 positive. It was a moment that redefined my understanding of strength and set me on a path where I had to confront my deepest fears head-on.
No one in my family has had breast cancer or ovarian cancer, nor have they been tested for genetic mutations. Upon further exploration of my family history, I came to find out that I am of Ashkenzi Jewish ancestry (1 in 40 Ashkenazi Jews carry a BRCA mutation). I didn’t even know of BRCA mutations or of this ancestry connection prior to meeting with the genetic counselor, and there I was being faced with the decision to remove body parts in order to save my life.
Understanding My Test Results
Receiving the news that I carried the BRCA2 gene mutation was daunting. The heightened risk of breast and ovarian cancer felt so heavy, casting a shadow over my future. My initial reaction was one of fear and uncertainty. I was scared of what was to come and what this test result meant for me and my family. Questions raced through my mind: What if I made the wrong decision? How would this affect my loved ones? I felt overwhelmed, not knowing much about BRCA2 and the implications it carried.
The more I learned about BRCA2, the clearer it became that I had to take action. The statistics were concerning, and the risk was real. Yet, the decision to undergo a preventative double mastectomy and the removal of my fallopian tubes was not made lightly. It was a choice fueled by the desire to maintain my health and to ensure that I could continue to be here for my family, especially my two young children.
The fear of making the wrong decision was intense. I worried about the potential complications, the impact on my body, and the emotional toll it would take. I was also concerned about how my family would cope with this reality. My husband, Steven, was my rock, providing unwavering support and understanding, but I still feared the unknown and the possibility of regret.
However, I knew that inaction was not an option. The risk of cancer was too significant to ignore, and the potential to prevent it was a gift I couldn't pass up. This journey taught me that sometimes, the scariest decisions are the ones that ultimately empower us the most.
The Power of Choice
In moments of uncertainty, the power to choose is our greatest strength. Opting for these preventative measures was a proactive step towards taking control of my health. It wasn’t just about avoiding potential illness; it was about embracing life with a renewed sense of purpose and determination. The process was physically and emotionally taxing, but each step reinforced my belief in my own resilience.
One of the most empowering aspects of this journey was realizing that, despite the genetic test results being out of my control, I still had the power to make a choice that could significantly alter my future. The decision to have preventative surgeries was about reclaiming control over my body and my destiny. It was about saying, "I choose to take action. I choose to fight. I choose to live without fear."
This power of choice in a situation that initially seemed overwhelming allowed me to transform a narrative of fear into one of strength and empowerment. It was a profound reminder that, even when faced with challenges, we have the ability to influence our path and our outcomes. The alternative—waiting and hoping—was not an option I was willing to accept. Instead, I embraced the proactive approach, turning uncertainty into a powerful assertion of my will to live fully and healthily.
Strength as a Mother and Wife
As a mother, the decision was deeply personal. I wanted to be there for my children, to watch them grow, and to guide them through life’s many milestones. My boys were a huge factor in my decision. I needed to ensure that I would be around to see them through every milestone, to celebrate their successes, and to support them through challenges. Their future was a constant motivator, pushing me to make choices that would safeguard my health and allow me to be present in their lives.
My role as a wife also played a crucial part. Steven was supportive of every decision I made. He was my chauffeur, my nurse, my chef, and everything in between. Together, we faced this challenge head-on, reinforcing our bond and deepening our understanding of partnership and commitment. We were both concerned about what this journey had in store, but we leaned on each other, finding strength in our shared determination and love.
This journey required strength not just for myself, but also for my entire family and my loved ones. We were all in this together, and our collective strength made the journey more bearable. The support and love from my family, friends, and community were my pillars, helping me navigate the emotional and physical challenges I faced.
Emotional Fortitude
Navigating my emotions on this journey required immense inner strength. Our bodies are remarkable in their ability to heal, but it was my mindset and emotional well-being that needed the most attention and nurturing. There were days filled with anxiety, fear, and sadness, especially when considering major surgery as a mom with young children who are dependent on me. The thought of being temporarily unable to care for them was disheartening, but I knew the bigger picture of my health was most important.
The journey tested me in profound ways. I found comfort in small victories, in moments of laughter, and in the unwavering support of those around me. Each emotional challenge was met with a determination to rise above, reminding me that my strength was not just physical but deeply rooted in my spirit.
Writing this blog is not just about sharing my story; it’s about highlighting the incredible power we all possess to make tough decisions and to face our fears with grace and courage. My journey is a testament to the strength within each of us, a reminder that even in the face of life’s greatest challenges, we can emerge stronger, more resilient, and more connected to those we love including a stronger connection within ourselves.
Moving Forward
As I continue this journey, I am filled with gratitude. Gratitude for the medical advancements that made these preventative measures possible, for the unwavering support of my family and friends, and for the inner strength that has carried me through. I am not defined by my gene mutation, but by my response to my gene mutation.
To anyone facing a similar journey, know that you are not alone. Your strength is immeasurable, and your courage will guide you through. Embrace your power, make your choices with confidence, and surround yourself with those who lift you up. Together, we can face any challenge, and together, we can emerge stronger.
Thank you for reading my story. May it inspire you to find your own strength in the face of life’s challenges.
Get BRCA Answers
Think you or someone you love might carry a BRCA mutation? Genetic counseling and testing is recommended for individuals whose family and personal health histories point to an increased chance of a cancer gene mutation. To learn if you may be a candidate for genetic testing, take the BRCA risk factor quiz.
How can I get involved in the Basser Young Leadership Council?
Learn more about the Young Leadership Council of the Basser Center for BRCA on our website. To learn about how to become involved with the YLC, please contact Carolyn Brown or call 215.573.0550.